The start of a dream...

It all started with a book... a very cute children's book to be exact.  

Three years ago I took my kids to the library to take out books to read at home.  My little one Mia chose a book called Maisey and the Pirates - the ghost ship, by UK author Sam Walshaw.  To be truthful, it was the Afrikaans translated version of the book, but for purposes of this blog, I will refer to the English version. That night she asked me to read the book to her at bed time and being the actress-mom I am, I of course did it with silly voices and lots of gestures and weird faces.

She laughed herself silly the whole way through and I had to repeat the process for two more nights.

By night three I was sitting with the book on my lap, looking at it and thinking "this would make a great children's theater show".  So I did something very scary for me... I looked up the author and actually CONTACTED her through her webpage, explained who I was, that I was involved in amateur theater in South Africa and that I would love to develop the book into a show.

For three months I heard nothing, so I basically gave up on the idea and kept myself busy as stage manager for an amateur theater company in our area.  Until one day when I opened up my emails and found a mail from the author Sam's publisher, Stuart Trotter from Rockpool Children's Books.  They LOVED my idea and had never even thought that such a thing could be done and gave me permission to go ahead, promising their support all the way.  I was ecstatic!  And then I realized my dilemma... I had no theater group to do the show with and no money to fund it.

They say man plans but God decides, and in my case He had decided that it was time that I realized my life-long dream of running a children's theater group.  So I contacted a few lady drama friends I'd gotten to know through various previous productions I'd worked on and asked them to come to my house for an idea I wanted to pitch to them.  On 16 April 2016, I told the founding members of what would become Drama Queen Productions about my dream of a Children's Theater company, which would also be a children's ministry group, and that I had gotten the rights to the books (there were 4 in total) from the author.  They all wanted to join me in this mad endeavor and so we founded our group.  We all agreed that our focus would be drama, music and puppetry for kids aged 3 to 14, to bring them the life giving message of God's word.  Along with this, we would work towards staging the books by Sam.

Choosing a name for the group was a challenge... nothing felt right to me.  We all suggested various ones, until I remembered a birthday card I once got, saying "happy birthday Drama Queen".  And it just... clicked.  More than just being drama queens in life, we made the attachment to the name that we were daughters of a most high God, our King, and that we used drama as our medium to spread our message to kids.

And so we were officially Drama Queen Productions... on our way to greatness!  I have so much more to tell you about our group, so more blogs about my queens will follow soon.

Love thy neighbor...

Last night my next door neighbor played music so loud that it was rattling my window frames... at 8 pm at night.  In my innocence, I sent her a message asking if they could possibly turn the music down just a bit, for the sake of my windows.  Thinking her a Christian woman like me, I was confident she would be a good neighbor.

I was wrong.

The response I got was that the music was turned off completely and when I sent a note to say that it wasn't necessary, I got a rather nasty reply back from her, coupled with being blocked on Whatsapp.  This completely threw me and I've been struggling to "get over it" since last night.

How can someone that gave them self out to me, on the day we formally met, as a Christian, be so vindictive and mean to a neighbor?  The hurt I felt made me look for solace in my Bible and I found a few verses on the subject of neighbors that told me:

So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.  Matthew 7:12
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Each of us should please our neighbors for their good, to build them up. Romans 15:2

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Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers. Galatians 6:10 

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Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in the way of a brother or sister. Romans 14:13

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Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.  Colossians 3:13

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The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these. Mark 12:31

If you are a true Christian, our first thought should not be one of spite, but of being a good neighbor, as the Bible clearly instructs us to do.  Hubby and I've always tried to be good neighbors, yet thinking back, I've never had good neighbors anywhere we've lived as a married couple, who've treated us the same way.  Why is this?  Do people mistrust each other so much, that we cannot even be kind to the person living next to us who has to take our loud music late at night?  Life has changed so much... I didn't grow up knowing neighbors like this.  Our neighbors as kids were like family... we were constantly in each other's houses, laughing and playing together, got scolded by each other's parents, helped each other out in need and are still friends today, all grown up.

I struggle with small things like neighborly conflicts affecting my life.  I don't like people not liking me, ever.  I try so hard to please others, that it has taken quite a physical toll on me.  My eldest seems to be the same and can get affected by people's responses the same way I do, while my husband has this way of just letting things roll off his shoulders - something I envy and wish I could do too.

Every time I get upset like this, I mull it over and over in my head, making it even worse.  I don't sleep well and I grind my teeth badly, to the point where I am currently sitting with an abscess and am going for a root canal today.  I am praying so hard every day that this will be the year that God will deliver me from this evil and make me a happy person again.

So to you, my neighbor who so clearly needs to hear the Word more in your life - I forgive you for your response to my simple request.  I will keep on greeting you and if you don't greet me back, I will pray for you.  But I will not be defined by your response to my request - to be a good neighbor, as God expects us to be.  Some day you too will learn this lesson:

Smiling while you are breaking inside...

Anxiety... 

Depression...

...words I never really knew existed until I grew up.  They must have had other  names when I was small, names that were said in hushed tones and with rolling eyes by my family members about my mother.

When I was small, I knew her as a wonderful, fun, playfull stay at home mother who was always there for us.  Then our life took a bad turn with dad's bad business decisions and she had to go back to teaching, to try to save our house. I remember seeing my mother "break down" and cry for days when things got too much for her to bear.  Crying, sleeping, eating (not much), going to work, repeat.  I couldn't understand why she cried so much, why the efforts we in our childish minds were doing to make her feel better, did not help at all.  Nothing helped.  She would not speak to us, shut herself in her room and just cried.  The crying led to anxiety attacks, which triggered her epileptic attacks.  It was not a good thing for a child to see their parent in so much heartache and spiritual pain.

And in spite of all she did, we still lost it all and had to start over.  She had to be strong again, keep the crying for another day.

Then I grew up.  And life started hitting me from all sides and I started understanding the feeling of just crying and crying and crying, because the pain inside was just... too much.

Now they give it names... clinically depressed, post natal depression, anxiety, etc, etc.  Yet no pill can cure what I feel inside.  I can be in a room full of people and still feel lonely.  I have a wonderful husband, yet I feel unloved.  I do well in work and play, yet constantly feel like a big failure.  I am not a happy person, at all, yet I have nothing to be unhappy about. I never feel good enough and no one ever tells me that I AM good enough, strong enough, brave enough, mother enough, wife enough.  Why don't they tell me so I can feel better?

So what do I do?  I cry... and cry... and cry... and then pick myself up as my mother did, and hope the constant hurt in my heart will lift some day.  Surely it MUST go away someday?  I feel like I'm only existing... never LIVING! I'm always the one with the sparkling personality, a quick joke and a smile that never reaches my eyes...

I've sat with pills in my hand so many times, just wanting to go to sleep and not wake up again... but never had the guts to actually do it.  I'm a Christian.  That would be like murder in God's eyes.  But why then does He let me feel like this?  Constantly sad, crying, but having to put up a smiling face and interact with people every day, when all I want to do is cover my head and stay in bed.

Anxiety... a horrible, terrible thing.  I hate you!  Depression - just leave me alone!  I need my life back. I need time for myself, to rest and do things I love, to smell the roses, to sit with a good book and a cup of coffee.

So life... Just back off, will you? I need time to heal.

The cry of a mother...

Mothers have an unfair advantage with the Lord. In Luke 7, Jesus observed a huge funeral procession in Nain. The entire town was present. He observed the young men and women weeping. He observed the pastors and apostles weeping. He observed the elders weeping. He observed the fathers weeping. He observed the children weeping. He observed the sadness on people's faces. Nothing seemed to move Him, until HE SAW THE MOTHER. The bible says He had compassion when He saw her and immediately raised her boy from the dead.

(Luke 7:12-15). It was the cry of a mother that moved the Heart of God.

Still today, Mothers who cry before the Lord for their families, for their marriages, for their homes move the Heart of God. When Mothers stop praying their families (especially their children) perish. Satan gets a foothold and starts to destroy the home, yet when they return to their rightful place as the anchor of the home, demonic strongholds get demolished.

In Psalms 17, 36, 57, 63, and 91 God's role is likening to that of a Mother. As a Mother protects, upholds and defends her children, so does God also protect us under the shadow of His Wings. We find refuge there and can hide there until the danger is over. A mother's role is so vital that a father cannot get his prayers answered if he dishonours/ disrespects her.

(1Peter 3:7). Because, of this favour over mothers, they are also the most attacked persons in the home. The devil is terrified of Mothers (the powerhouse in the home). Yet the Lord has put inside Mothers grace and resilience to overcome any situation. Today, As the woman of the home, consider yourself blessed.

Consider yourself highly favoured and consider yourself dangerous when you pray.  Be Blessed!!

Competition time!

 

So the Bellas are having the most awesome competition:  We are looking for a Charity Ambassador.  Wow.  I wish I was 18 again so I could enter...  and fit into those clothes again, haha!   For once it’s not all about looks and bodies... it’s about how you help your neighbour.  This is one of this things that I love most about Bella Donna:  Yes we teach etiquette and style and make-up and all that jazz... but we also teach social responsibility. 

 

So many young girls out there have no idea what kind of an impact they could have on their environment if they just took 1 hour a week to do something worthwhile.  There are so many shelters (animal and human) out there that could do with some help, so many people who need clothing, so many elderly who would love someone to just visit them.  Yet we never seem to have the time.  I for one am looking forward to doing some of the social stuff with the entrants from my area.  I want to really be there for them and to encourage them every step of the way.  And if one of mine wins... well, even better!

 

The prizes are beyond this world and include photography shoots, pamper sessions, a weekend getaway, a house party, money, a limousine ride, facial products... to many to mention!  But mostly, she will be standing for a good cause and be our Bella Girl, our face.  I get exited just thinking about it!  The crowning evening promises to be a gala event, with celebrities, music, lights and evening gowns.  Every girls dream!

       

So why not enter?  Come on, you have nothing to loose!  And so much to gain...  For once this is a chance for the girl in the corner to strut her stuff, show her skills en be reckoned, without having to worry about beauty or the perfect body.

 

Go see what it’s all about on our website at www.belladonnaclasses.com – NOW!!

Bella Donna Classes Brackenfell Branch had our certificate evening!

On the 22nd of July 2011 my Brackenfell branch had our certificate evening and fashion show for our first class. What an affair! It was a no-holding-back, glitz-and-glam evening... Held in a factory! Jip, you read right, a factory. It took some hard work from my team (hubby, dad, friends, myself and of course the girls' tables) to turn it from drab to fab in a day, but miracles do happen!

Of course we had some hiccups: Trying to find a caterer to fit our budget was impossible, so my husband Herman's rep at his business, Lucinda, offered to help with the food by making lasagne and salad. My dad made butternut soup for the first time in his life, while Lucinda's daughter Chanel made her famous Malva pudding for desert. None of our sound stuff wanted to work together, so we phoned Mandy from HQ who helped us out with sound AND lights. Two of the girls (sisters) had to pull out at the last minute, leaving me scrambling to find 2 models to replace them and having to cut on costs due to less ticket sales. Then, as I was soaking in the bath (my thinking space) the Thursday before the show, it hit me: the Bellas of the future! My own 2 little girls, Chené (7) and Mia-Mari (3) could stand in for them. Obviously the clothes wouldn't fit, but mommy made a plan, while my friends bought tickets to help me out!

On Friday night the girls arrived around 5 pm to set up their tables and be taken through their steps again by model master Kevin, before being beautified by our team. My friend Lana played hostess and saw to the guests, while I still got dressed upstairs. After the welcome to all, we were ready to begin! The girls entertained their own guests at their tables while the starter was served. After the starter, they went to get dressed in their fashion show best, while I chatted to the guests about our sponsors and the girls themselves. All during our evening the girls were judged by phantom judges on some of the things they were taught, as we had some wonderful sponsored prizes for them. And then the show began. We had a range from Chanel Sauerman from Revival Style as the girls’ first outfits, then cocktail dresses, then the most beautiful evening gowns – both sponsored by The Princess Project. The girls wore masks for the evening gowns, taking them off after making their first turn on the runway – symbolizing that they are not the same person they were before the classes. The masks were repeated in our décor on the tables as well.

Once the show was done, we had our main meal and then the prize giving. After thanking all my special helpers, we announced the winners in each category. The girls had WOWed the guests and quite a few sisters / cousins / friends were VERY jealous and made sure to take a pamphlet! Pudding was served and people chatted away for a while afterwards. It seemed as if people had fun, as it ended off an hour later than I had anticipated – despite everything running (roughly) on time! I was so proud of my girls and it took all I had not to cry. We were also very honored to have Mandy and Marilet from head office there to share in the evening.

The evening was a resounding success, thanks to everyone’s hard work. We were truly blessed by so many people and I would like to mention them now:

- Mike from Fox & Brink in Epping, for organizing us a donation of fresh veggies towards our food costs.

- Graham Ross for the use of his sound equipment after ours failed.

- My husband Herman, for his help, support and doing our sound at the show.

- My dad Henry, being everywhere I needed him.

- My friend and ex-marketer Lana Smit, for all her help.

- Trudie Kotze, for lending us her heating plate for the food and her gas heater for the cold factory.

- Lucinda Moses, for stepping in and making our fabulous food.

- Suzaan Saayman (my sister) and Amelia Kotze for doing our ladies' fabulous hair.

- Tanja Williams and Louisa Marais for the professional make-up they did on our girls.

- Chanel Sauerman from Revival Style for supplying us with part of her fashion range for our show.

- The Princess Project, who sponsored the ladies' cocktail and evening gowns. They are a non-profit organization who supply underprivileged ladies with gowns and accessories for their functions, at no cost.

- Janine and Wikkie van Rooyen from the mR 5 stores for sponsoring so much of our décor of the evening, as well as the table arrangements on my tables, made by Janine herself.

Our prize sponsors were:

Connie Prinsloo from Connique Jewellery, who sponsored this beautiful set for our best hostess winner, Ané. As Connie says herself, her work is ’A Personal Statement of Elegance and Charm’. Please visit her facebook page to see more of her work - It truly is a work of art!

http://www.facebook.com/ConniqueJewellery

Wikkie and Janine van Rooyen from the mR 5 Stores, who sponsored the prize for the best table winner Louise – a gift voucher to shop at their stores! From personal experience, I know that she will have too much to choose from… See their FB page here:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/MR-5-store/117131251671049

From Natacha Wadsworth of Natacha Wadsworth Photograpy, who sponsored a free photography session for our model winner, Heather. Knowing Natacha since our school days, I’m sure she will make our girl look pure BELLA! Can’t wait to see those pics… See her website here:

http://www.natachawadsworth.co.za/

Please check out our photos of the evening on the Bella Donna Group Page on Facebook – there are some really nice pictures there. Once again, a warm thank you to everyone involved. To my girls – you were gorgeous, really Bella-esque… I will miss you!

Changing life’s lanes...

I was driving along, on my way to work one morning a few weeks back, when I got the idea for this blog.  You see, I have bad eyesight - and because of this I hate driving in peak hour traffic.  My reaction time is too slow to be effective and I’m always too scared or too slow to take a gap if one pops up.  My husband Herman on the other hand is a terrific driver, gap-taker and general manoeuvring-his-way-through-peak-traffic-fast-and-efficient-and-without-dents-to-the-car-person. So I prefer to be driven around, instead of driving myself around - not that he LETS me drive when he's with me!

Anyway, what was my point here? Oh yes...  Being a person afraid of taking gaps, also seems to make me generally terrified of taking risks of any kind.  But this morning, as I sat waiting for the line to move, I saw a guy take the gap and get ahead of the rest of us scardy-cats...  And something inside me just said 'I want to do that!  I want to take the gaps and not be so afraid of them anymore!'  You see, I'm one of those 'safe bets' when it comes to people, always on the straight and narrow.  So why now?  Why want to change now?

It might have something to do with the fact that I resigned my job this past December to run my own business as of next week.  Though the business has been in existence for almost a year, it's still a major prayer case - which I do, every day.  For me though, this has been a major gap-taking, totally against my nature.  Yet I find myself thinking outside my straight line more and more, as if this one wild act has released something in me, something that makes me want to be that gap-taker, that gal who gets ahead in life.  I've been waiting for this chance my whole life, and golly, I'm taking it!  Perhaps this is just another part of my ONE new year's resolution - this year I'm going to live my dream! What is my dream, you may ask.  Well, ever since I became a mom I wanted a job where I could be with my kids when they needed me, but still be a leader in my field.  And now I'll have my dream with this business - though I have another business along the side, to help with the cash flow!  You know me, always busy...  I guess the time for make or break is now, when my dream is within my grasp.

So, the next time you see a white ford tracer taking the gap in traffic, the one you were too hesitant to take yourself...  That gap-taker is me - going for it!   Wish me luck...

Be Blessed!